major_west

...

[West tries to start a sentence, then stops himself. Then starts again. Then stops himself. This continues a few times]

As a matter of clarification: how do floods affect... ah... the showers?

That is...

I'm... not meant to use the men's showers at this time, am I? Or, being truly a man, is it... I--





I truly detest floods.

[OOC: FOR REFERENCE, West has totally still been using the men's showers. SO UH, I guess if any dude Inmates saw a chick in there? Yeah

LOL FOR FURTHER REFERENCE: West hasn't been walking around naked, so the most you saw was a chick in a towel UNLESS YOU WERE CREEPY ENOUGH TO PEEP INTO THE SHOWER STALLS which you probably were]

So I was going to go for a little dip in the pool-- take a break from all the kids here (I mean, after this little slice of 'motherhood,' I don't think I'll ever fancy the thought of having children. Lovely little darlings, but 18 years of this?)-- when it was just filled with this gunk! Looks like somebody spilled fruit punch into it or something, although knowing this place, it's probably blood or some other rubbish. Honestly, is a little upkeep too much to ask for around here?

Well, at least the jacuzzi looks alright. Billy Any lads, care to join me? Oh, nevermind that, it's a bit too weird to go have a sit down in nice, bubbly water while there's a pool full of blood or what-have-you nearby.

Well, there must be something to do in this dreadful place. You won't find me going off on one of those ridiculous death trap floors, of course, so we'll have to make our own entertainment here, if anybody's interested in taking a break from their fretting and complaining.

Hmm... I've got some things in my kitchen-- Oh! Fresh baked cookies! How does that sound, children? And Morgan, I've made you a nice sandwich with a glass of milk, so sit down and eat it now, alright?

Oh, look at me, going on like a regular Bridget Jones in this silly little diary!


[OOC: West's been CONSUMED by the genderswap flood and has become a vaguely airheaded stereotype, alas. LUCKILY, he'll run down to Level 2 eventually, then come back as Dumb Jock West to harass any geeks or burnouts <3

AND: Strikes unreadable]

This is boring, really. There isn't anything for a girl child to do here on the Barge, is there?

I suppose that makes sense. I mean, it's a place for dead people, crooks and criminals, so yeah, I understand why the options for entertainment are limited. We're to be punished and all until we repent. But you'd think I could at least get a show on the telly, instead of static. I don't even know why I have this if I can't get any of the channels working. I can't even do much of anything at the gym right now, and I'm not allowed in the pool area, or the pub, don't feel like reading, so what am I supposed to do?

Oh!

That's right! I've got my neph-- that Playstation!



...I've never used one of these before. How do I get it hooked up?

I was struck with a compulsion to shave my legs among other areas. Being blond (NATURAL, thank you), I suppose it wasn't necessary, buuuut~ I might as well show my legs off now! Thank god for these skirts; I don't know what I would've done with all those rubbish trousers.

Does this mean I'll have smooth legs when I'm a man again? Oh dear, I hope not.

Morgan, I really must insist you take me to the pool!

xoxo
Hen Maj Umm... me?

[OOC: Flood + Hormones is starting to affect his braaain and making him write and act all girly]